Dear Friends,
I am a stressed mother. I have a child who is like wild animal! I know I should not say this about my son but he is driving me mad. He is only 8 years old but will argue about anything that I ask him to do. His first reaction to any request is a loud Why and then he will either refuse to do it, argue as to why he should not do it or finally just walk away. The request may be a simple one like go take a bath or do your homework or even come eat your lunch.
Please help with advise............
Please help with advise............
1 comment:
Dear stressed Mum,
You have not told me when these problems started. Often children
will behave in a defiant way as a way of coping with problems
(externalising behaviours). Does he have any problems at school? Is
he finding the work difficult or is his teacher too strict or is he
getting bullied. If any one of this is true he may be refusing to go
to school. If he has always been a difficult or restless child he may
have learnt to get his way by being difficult. He may have disorders
like Oppositional Defiance Disorder, ADHD or conduct disorder.
In any case one of the best ways to handle him is to sit him down
when he is not being difficult and ask him to help you lay ground
rules. If he helps to make the rules he is more likely to follow
them. Make a behaviour contract where he gets rewarded for following
the rules and fined (no TV or no pocket money for a day) for breaking
them.
Get him to enjoy doing tasks. This can be done by not asking him to
do something, which is difficult or boring (at least to begin with).
Praise him for caring out simple tasks like get me tissue please at
least 6 to 7 times a day. If he does not do it just ignore him and do
it yourself (planned ignoring). Do this for 3 to 4 weeks. Gradually,
your son will enjoy doing tasks for you. It is very important not to
force him to do something, to give him tasks which are easy and /or
interesting and praising him when he does them.
Finally, if you are unable to carry out the program and there is too
much shouting and fighting seek professional help. Remember to show
him your unconditional love for him and do things, which are fun with
him every so often.
For more information call us at
Singhania Children's Clinic, Dubai Health Care City, Dubai; P: +971 4
429 8498; Email: singhaniaclinic@yahoo.com
Post a Comment